Last weekend, I had the privilege of attending the 3^rd annual Pro-Life Women’s Conference put on by Abby Johnson’s ministry “And Then There were None” in conjunction with several other fantastic sponsors. I’ll be honest, as someone who has been actively working in the pro-life movement since junior year of college, I pridefully and wrongfully assumed most of what I’d be hearing would be things I already knew. And while there were a lot of things that I already “knew” with my head, God absolutely used this weekend to RE-new my heart for the pro-life effort and remind me of these seven imperative lessons for any and all of us who consider ourselves pro-life:

*disclaimer: please note that the following represent my personal views/interpretations, and are in no way representative of any of the views held by the aforementioned organizations

1) The pro-life movement (encompassing all issues concerning the dignity of human life, from conception to natural death) is one of RESTORATION. What I mean by that, is that at the heart of our work in these matters is (or should be) an effort to ‘restore  to a truth’ rather than “fix a “problem”. These issues we find ourselves facing—abortion…euthanasia…suicide…these are wounds. They are symptoms, not the root, of the brokenness that exists in our fallen world. Having personally discussed this with many a philosopher, I truly believe that at the crux of these wounds is an identity crisis. (for which Theology of the Body is TOTALLY the anecdote – but I digress, another post for another time). As a collective society, we have forgotten or for some, perhaps, never understood or been told, that our inherent dignity lies outside of ourselves and in the One who created us; that it is in Him alone we will find true satisfaction & true knowing of ourselves. If we don’t know our Father, and are thus, unable to truly know ourselves, we will not know where to go to fill the voids that inevitably plague us—the ones that cannot be filled by relational love, or temporary highs, or attaining. And when we fail to understand where to receive this affirmation of our dignity which we so desire, our lives will be spent searching for restoration IN the brokenness rather than beyond it. We as pro-life people are called to be bearers of a Truth and bringers of a Light that will restore what has been disordered by sin, namely, the reality and origin of the dignity of every human life.

2)  We should never use another person/group/etc’s pain as a platform for our agenda. There is no denying that abortion is one of, if not the greatest, human rights tragedy of our time. It is the cause of millions upon millions of deaths. It is loss on a scale of epic proportion. But the place to argue this, is not in the wake of someone else’s grief, regardless of whether or not we believe the grief to be ‘valid’. We should never come to that table, with comparison as our goal. The first words to leap from our lips in the discussion of other humanitarian issues should never be “Oh yeah? Well abortion is more tragic than that.” We are pro-life—when a human heart is breaking, hurting, aching, regardless of what brought that about, we should always meet that first and foremost with compassion.

3)  We need to reclaim the narrative surrounding abortion, motherhood, womanhood, and adoption. One fantastic speaker reminded us in her break-out session- “Words shape perception and perception shapes reality.” The smallest words can make the biggest difference in how something is perceived. One example provided at the conference was concerning the perception of adoption in our society. When we use certain phrases like “giving a baby up for adoption” we, often unintentionally, perpetuate a fear surrounding this life-giving, love-giving option. When we say “make an adoption plan” – the whole perception changes, from a mother who is  abandoning a child to one who is intentionally and purposefully making a plan to give that baby a different opportunity than what she can provide. Which is exactly why we need to be SO intentional with our words surrounding all life issues. We need to choose language that validates, that encourages and that authentically empowers those whom we talk to and those whom we talk about.

4)  Community is what happens when we come alongside others and walk with them where they are at. Most people would pin community as a place or a group of people. A noun. But I learned this weekend that true community is a verb. It’s something that happens when ACTION is taken. Community is an outward sign of the Holy Spirit at work within our hearts and our relationships, and when authentic community happens, it is a beautiful sight to behold and a force to be reckoned with.

5)  Our most imperative pro-life work will be accomplished in the smallest things. In loving our spouses. In teaching our children. In being a friend. And so we must be careful not to fall into the notion that being pro-life has more to do with our voting ballot than with how we live our lives day to day. Pro-life is meant to happen at the heart level, first, and flow outward from there. It is not just to be a value we hold, but a mannerism in which we live, speak, act and treat those around us.

6) OUR. Stories. Matter. SO much. And, on one level or another, we are each called to share them. Whether we are mothers, or grandmothers, or students, or single young adults—whether we’ve known great suffering or not—whatever God has done or is doing in our lives, is not meant just for us. Revelation 12:11 says “they have conquered him by the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony.” This verse in itself is proof that not only does your story matter, it is needed to overcome the work of the Enemy of Life in our world. He is conquered by Jesus, and then again by us sharing who Jesus is in our lives and what He has done for us. Boom- double whammy. So never let yourself be told that you are too young, or your wounds too deep or your past too dark. I pray that each of us, when the opportunities arise, will have the courage to share our hearts knowing that what God will do with our courage is far greater and more important than anything that we have to fear.

7)  We as the ‘pro-life movement’ are victorious- but the victory is not “ours” to claim. This probably sounds like an oxymoron, but what I mean is…(as said by one of the fantastic speakers to grace the main stage) “we are walking from a place of victory, not to it” wait. Pause. read that again. “We are walking from a place of victory, not to it.”… because God already conquered all that we are battling. Sin. Death. He has defeated it! And so we have the advantage of knowing the outcome…we WIN, sisters! And that should allow us to go into this battle joyfully. That is why we can be filled with hope even as we stare directly into the face of evil, ugly things. But we cannot do this unless we remember whose victory we carry…it isn’t ours, its God’s. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve heard pro-life leaders, speakers, ministries, claim that “they” or “we” will be the ones to end abortion in our time. NO, my beloved brethren, “we” will not. The Enemy of Life would certainly love for us to think just that. That somehow, “we” can do it. To put the pressure of such a responsibility on our shoulders and watch as it drains us of our energy, passion and love until nothing but despair and bitterness remain. WE can claim victory because we have been claimed BY Victory, by our Victorious God. Because we are HIS and our identity is in Him and Him alone.

 

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If you’ve made it all the way to the bottom of this post, thank you for sticking it out and reading to the end. I pray this sharing of what I learned will be a source of encouragement, or inspiration, or call to action (or whatever it is that the Lord knows you may need) as you continue to uphold the dignity of every life in all aspects of your own. And if you’d like to continue the conversation started at this conference, I’d love to hear your thoughts and share more of my own- feel free to comment or email!

Love+Blessings,

Faith

Hello dear readers and happy summer! We’re pausing to check in with YOU as we checked in with each other over this past weekend over a wonderful breakfast and even better company.

Life has been a little bit crazy-busy for the both of us (as you may have deduced from the lack of consistent blogging over the past couple months) – with weddings, graduations (including Joseph’s medal ceremony as he transitions from the ‘baby’ to ‘toddler’ class at his gym) and planning for summer trips and vacations all crowding around the calendars. Mary is preparing to walk the Camino de Santiago in Spain soon and Faith is bracing herself for a twelve hour car ride with a twenty month old. Both daunting tasks!

Yet, Despite the busyness of these seasons of our lives, Jesus continues to still our hearts with His love and remind us who all these efforts are for. He continues to teach us about trusting Him wholly, reminding us that despite all the chaos we may muddle through, the best laid plans we pour into pursuing (including the times they go awry) HE is sufficient, through and in it all.

And what better way to remember this than to dive into the abyss of love found in the Sacred Heart? During this month dedicated to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, we encourage you as we do one another to rest our heads longer on the chest of our Sweet Savior, as did the beloved apostle St. John, in order to hear the sound of it beating on our behalf. If we listen, we can hear it pounding with love, mercy, compassion, forgiveness – a perfect combination of humanity with the Divine. Truly it is a heart for our hearts, One strong enough to withstand our every doubt, fear, rejection- One stronger, even, than death.

Will you join us there for awhile? Will you join us in seeking this Heart which so tirelessly pursues us?

With all our love,

Mary & Faith

It was seven o’clock in the morning in Lambert St. Louis Airport last winter when I headed, not to my gate, but to the familiar double D branded awning that just opened its doors. Dunkin Donuts is always my #1 priority after a TSA approval. As I waited for my latte at the counter, I turned around and began the second-best part to airport travel – people watching.

Almost immediately, I noticed two nuns in full habit enter the gate across from me. They sat down at a high top charging station and commenced talking between each other. It was then that I felt it – a nudge.

I was traveling alone and knew that the nudge wasn’t coming from an outside source… it was a nudge from within to jump out beyond my comfort zone. It’s in moments like these that I relate to the clown fish in “Finding Nemo.” The father fish, Marlin, teaches his son how to leave the confines of their underwater home by telling him, “First we go out a little then we go back back in a little. And then we go back out, and then back in.” The “out and in” battle was waging as my internal comfort zone. The nudge to “go out” finally won and I found myself standing in front of two fully habited nuns.

I introduced myself to the sisters and asked about their travels, offering to buy them breakfast. They declined, saying that they were waiting for the Burger King to open nearby later that morning. (Sisters with stomaches of steel, I thought!) We chatted for a few minutes and shared a bit of our travels with each other. It was Advent and we were all headed to retreats at opposite ends of the country. We exchanged intentions for prayer before I headed off to find my own gate.

“How cool was that?” I mused as I walked sat on my plane an hour later, “Here I am traveling alone and I’m suddenly a part of other people’s adventures.” Even better – those adventures we were now sharing in a spirit of prayer before the Lord.

It took a nudge – an inward call to step out beyond the invisible wall of comfort vs. daring in order to discover more about the world and the people around me. And this was certainly not the first time I had noticed the nudge. In fact, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I owed much of the happiness of my life to that nudge.

It was, in fact, the same nudge that prompted me over the years to open my doors to friends and strangers when I was less than “ready” to entertain guests; those moments building some of the strongest friendships I now enjoy.

It was acting on the nudge that landed me a job, an audition, and a raise. Taking the risk and jumping out of my comfort zone meant overcoming the fear of failure. The result? Always moving forward and being able to discover more or lay a question to rest.

The nudge was ever-present in my pro-life job on the sidewalk when counseling women entering the abortion facility. In many situations, this nudge became a giant force of grace to guide women to a place of life-giving support. This kind of nudge, I am sure, was the Holy Spirit.

In my life as a whole, these nudges remind me of a line up of dominos. By itself, a single domino is only a few inches in length, stiff, and thin. But when standing on end and gently nudged, a wave of movement ensues that extends far and wide and at an accelerated speed. This movement is caused simply by a series of nudges – just like the ones that come in our own lives when we dare beyond our comfort zone. And in the end, instead of standing alone, we find ourselves surrounded by others and sharing in each others’ adventures.

So the next time you are hesitant to take a risk, reach out, or jump into the unknown, remember the power of the nudge and the fruits that come when we look outside ourselves and take interest in the world around us. It takes effort and a little bit of daring. And it’s always worth it!

Love, Mary