“Could you see yourself living here?”

It’s a phrase I heard many times in my adult life while searching for a home to call my own. I took that question quite seriously! While I had a list of “must have’s,” I also had a list of “could do withouts.” As I looked at houses, I found myself doing “without” on several occasions. I didn’t need much – just a place to call a home.

The result was that I found many “good” homes on which I promptly placed offers over the span of a few years. Before doing so, I made sure each one was a space I could live and love for many years to come. While the offers themselves were placed with haste due to the influx of buyers, the decision-making came from a solid belief that I could make “this house” my home.

The offer process was for me, a place where dreams lived. It was also where I discovered things about myself and desires of my heart that I didn’t know were there…

The first little house was a gardener’s dream. Aside from my plethora of indoor plants, I am not a gardener. But that didn’t stop me from suddenly thinking I could become one, spending my days cultivating seedlings in the little backyard greenhouse and trimming dozens of hedges in my “spare” summer time. I‘d have to do without a dining room, but in this house, I would become a gardener.

The house with the trees in one of the area’s oldest neighborhoods promised to be the perfect home. It had the loveliest outdoor patio, indoor den for entertaining, and cozy bedrooms. It was the type of home that sang a “hygge” song and promised many winter evenings curled up in the den with a good book. I was sure I’d love it there. This house had no backyard, and I was convinced that was for the better. Who wants to spend their whole summer growing plants and cutting grass? 🙂 I’d have to live without a yard, but in this house, I would become a hygge master.

The cottage by the park was my favorite of them all. It had New England charm, with white wood trim and bookcases from floor to ceiling. The upstairs gabled rooms were perfect for my home office and for entertaining overnight guests. The backyard seemed to belong to a landscaping company, with a fire pit and chicken coop. Do I like chickens? No. But that didn’t stop me from thinking this was the absolute perfect house. I’d have to live with some highway traffic, but in this house, I would become a backyard party hostess.

The green-trim house was the simplest one of them all, in the most beautiful neighborhood. It’s square footage was minimal, and it had no basement. Still, I was sure that if no one else wanted it because of it’s size and platform foundation, I would love it and make it a bright and cheerful space for myself and friends willing to squeeze around a kitchen table. I’d have to live simply, but in this house, I would become a member of a tight-knit neighborhood community.

House after house came and went. My offers were received along with as many as 15 other offers, some of them promising to pay in cash and waiving inspections – two things way outside my league.

And then it happened: one day, my house found me. It was everything that the other houses were and weren’t – all at the same time! In my house, I can be a gardener, a hygge master, a backyard party hostess, and a member of the tightest community (my own friends!). I have a dining room, a yard, the quiet sound of birds around me, and 500 additional square feet of home to share with others. It’s everything I could have imagined – and then some.

Now that I have my home, it often happens that I think of the other homes I “almost” owned as I drive around town. It’s easy to remember them as I pass the streets, grocery stores, and parishes that I was so close to calling my own, not that long ago. How strange! In my gratitude, I often feel amazed that my story could have been so different depending on the home where I lived. The truth is, I would have been totally happy in any one of them.

But mine! My little cottage tucked away amongst the homes of my friends, is the little space in this world where I claim my life, work, tears, and joy.s And I am totally okay with that.

It often makes me think about all the things we could have, do, or be in life – relationships, careers, studies, volunteer work, and even “stuff.” Many women I know are working a certain job or raising beautiful children – or both. Could the teacher make a great executive? Maybe so! Could the homeschooling mom make a great marketing guru? Absolutely! Would the nurse make a great stay at home mom? You bet!

Might that change for them or me someday? Yes! But if any one of us tried to be more than what we are right now and who we are called to be, to chase too many dreams just for the sake of being or having more, we could lose our sense of “home” inside us.

Dear reader, I hope this experience of my house hunting can be an encouragement to us all when it comes to what we desire and the places we “claim” in life. Let us not try to be everything to all, but to be who God made us to be and claim that “home” in His Heart for all eternity. Sometimes, He chooses to give us everything in return.