It’s been a while since the “Dear Single Sister” theme was carried through in our content. The truth is, I’m writing this letter to altogether discontinue the theme. Before you close your browser and chalk me up to another woman who going to pretend she doesn’t have a longing for a husband, children, and family, please hear me out.

I’ve learned something that begs to be shared: our longings can coexist with our contentment. It sounds crazy, but it’s true! I’ve learned that this (and all of the most essential lessons for single woman) are no different than they are for married woman, divorced women, and widowed women. That is why you are no longer my “single sister.” The days of calling out the single lifestyle as part of our name and title is over. You are simply His beloved, and my “sister” in Him.

I found a gal group that I call home and together we study scripture, reflect on spiritual readings, and treasure each other’s hearts. We never even think to identify ourselves as “single” or “married,” but as beloved daughters of the Father. We uphold the same core values and seek to cultivate the same virtues. Our lessons in hope, surrender, faith, and fortitude might look different in the day-to-day details, but they lead to the same end.

I want the same for you, and I believe God does, too.

If you’re reading this, you’ve likely heard the theory: “the moment you are content with your life is the moment that Mr. Right will step into it.” Well, I’m here to tell you that’s not true, and it doesn’t only apply to women seeking a spouse. Women seeking to conceive also hear this same story, with a slight twist. They hear, “The minute you adopt is the minute you’ll get pregnant.”

Has Mr. Right come to the woman who finds joy in her singleness? Yes. Do biological babies come to couples when they adopt? Yes, sometimes – but when these things come, they are not the reward for contentment.

If there is one thing that I would tell my 30-year-old self, it is this: God does not give gifts to the content; He gives contentment as a gift. Contentment is not something we “strive” for or work hard to achieve, rather, it is something we receive through prayer and God’s grace.  

When we have contentment – man, woman, married, single, you name it! – we have intimacy with God. That isn’t just “all” we need or “enough” for us. It is everything.

Dear sisters, go ahead and select “single” on your tax return, but please don’t stamp it on the front cover of your passport to life!

If every Catholic woman could identify as “content” with God, then no mountain would be too tall, no ocean too deep, and no desert too dry for our satisfied hearts! We would be unstoppable in our ability to receive more grace from the Father and share it with others around us. In this kind of feminine acceptance and appreciation, there is no room for comparison. We know it steals joy… so we run to share in life together!

So, I invite you, Dear Contented Sister, to join me in this high dive of trust, and pray to the Lord that He will give us the gift of contentment. Like the Samaritan woman at the well, let us say to Him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I may not be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water.” (Jn 4)